Sunday, August 20, 2006

What do you want?

(WARNING: This may sound like a whiny emo-kid ramble!)

A friend asked me and my social circle “What do you want to do before your next landmark birthday?” We went away and had a think about it. I think it’s the hardest question I’ve ever been asked.

I had one of those chats that go on till four in the morning with a close friend, and we discussed this. Hers were quite easy for her, including visiting a foreign country, joining the mile high club, and going to a music festival. Mine were much more difficult. Although I haven’t led an amazingly exciting life, most of her list I’ve already done (gone abroad), or wasn’t interested in (I’ve been inside an aeroplane toilet, so see no attraction to having sex there!)

Also, my interests have changed over the last few years. Asking me the same question five years ago would have brought out things like “Visit Japan”, something I’m not that fussed about now, as l only wanted to go for very shallow reasons that no longer apply. I’d have also included go out ‘dressed’ (done several times since), or held a snake (did a few weeks ago.).

There are a few things I want to do that really aren’t such a god idea in practice. For example I want a corset. But although this is great in theory, in practice I’ve got nowhere to wear it, I wouldn’t wear it enough to justify the expense, I don’t have the room, and I’ve no-one to lace it up. Several other require money I’m not willing to spend , or require a level of trust I’m not willing to make with the people I currently know (eg bondage play)

I think I have found maybe five.

  1. Find a job I don’t hate (we all had this one first!)

  2. Find someone I love, that loves me (vague I know)

  3. Go to an Ann Summers Party (tricky with the no-guys rule, but we might be able to work something)

  4. Have a food fight (location is tricky, but I’m sure I’m not the only one)

  5. Regain my local fame (I used to be a big fish in a small pond, and getting that back would be enough)

But other than that, I don’t know.

There’s no where I want to go particularly and there are no specific sexual practices that I want to do enough to include (or share with my friends!).

I wish I wasn’t so aimless.


richard eichmann said...

Numbers 1 and 2 are very high on my "getting my shit together" list at the moment.
As I was saying to a mutual friend the other day on a similar subject, I find the more you consciously want these things, the less they do. Don't get me wrong, it's sensible to think ahead, just don't obssess. Sometimes these things just happen.

As for number 4:
"We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars, but we won't. We're slowly learning that fact, and we're very, very pissed off..."

Chrissy said...

If enough T*Girls show interest in going to (or even hosting) an Ann Summers party, I don't see why it can't happen... money is money, no matter if it comes out of a purse or wallet, and no organiser would turn down such a 'gig'...

Pandora Caitiff said...

A good point. I wonder if its offical policy, or an unwritten one just to stop the leer factor. Most girls would be uncomfortable opeing up and being silly around a bloke, but if we show we're willing to be silly ourselves (by playing the ice-breaker games), and take part (going en-femme) maybe there's hope.

Chrissy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Chrissy said...

There was an article in my local paper about women who 'sell sex' (no, not in that way!) during which the Ann Summers' rule of 'no men' was pretty well reinforced. Which is fair enough.
But, if a party of women who all know a T*girl or two more or less well enough to invite them... well, I don't see what the problem is.
I feel an email to Ann Summers' head office coming on, to get the official policy...
Oh yeah, what do they do about TS women, whether pre- or post-op? Can't not allow them, that's discriminatory...