Things I Enjoyed in 2006

In no particular order.

• Children of Men – Fantastic thriller with Clive Owen and Michael Caine. Strong cast, an inspired dystopian future, and a valuable lesson for today.



• Fancy Dress Parties – The most fun you can have with someone else’s clothes on!



• Animal Crossing: Wide World – The reason I bought a Nintendo DS, and the reason I’m happy when it rains.



• Best friends – A cliché, but these are the people that kept me sane (You know who you are!)



• FilmFour – for bringing me all the Studio Ghibli goodness I could handle.



• CSI: New York – I’m a late-comer, but it’s still the only regular TV I watch. And I’m in love with “Montana”.



• Sugar Rush 2 – Great show with a great cast. More please.



• Lock and Load’s Battle of the Bands – Its encouraging seeing so much new local musical talent. And it’s the best night out you’ll have in Yarmouth during Spring/Summer.



• That Mitchell and Webb Look – And in particular The Surprising Adventures of Sir Digby Chicken Caesar. Dunderunderunderunderun…



• The Norwich Playhouse – Great place for a quiet drink in the evening. And as it’s far off the beaten track you don’t get the usual Friday-night rent-a-mob.



• We Love Katamari – If only I could get that catchy theme tune out of my head.



• Dead Rising – As much as hate the Xbox, this is the best zombie game ever!



• Nicola from Girls Aloud – my current lust object



• Evans – as every big girl knows.



• Wikipedia – Not always right, but always useful.



• Kingdom of Loathing – Still playing this online roleplayer one year on. And there’s still new content being added.

Wii Love You!

At the risk of sounding like a Nintendo fan-girl; Wii Sports is amazing!

The graphics are bright and cheery, but nothing the Gamecube couldn’t do.

The sports are basic, and would only be considered bonus games on another platform.

Fine control is fiddly and can sometimes appear arbitrary.

BUT IT’S SO MUCH FUN!

There were five of us last night crowded in a friend’s tiny bedroom, golfing, bowling and boxing. And we spent over five hours just playing Wii Sports (with a half hour break for Monkeyball and food).

You know you are on to a winner when a spectacular putt or a brutal low blow makes the whole room erupt with victorious or sympathetic noises.

Making the Mii (a virtual you) part of the console operation, and therefore transferable between games, is a great way to build in association with your character. OK so it’s not up to Second Life standards, but you can create very recognisable personas. And it’s that bond that makes us all wince as a below the belt uppercut swept Rick off his feet in Wii Boxing.

I’m not sure where they are going to end up, but Nintendo are back on the ascent.

FFS Doctor Beeching!

And so we continue the tale of woe of trying to buy my train tickets for Transpocalypse.

Last time on The 12 Tasks of Pandora I was told Central Trains were fannying about switching from return fares to singles only. The incredibly helpful girl at Norwich station gave me a timetable with *new single fares* scribbled on, and the advice to leave it for a couple of weeks. So I did.

I was about to ring the ticket sales line when I noticed the warning “Please note this telephone service is for ticket sales only. If you wish to enquire about times or prices please call National Rail Enquiries on…”

After a bit of negotiation, where it is clear I have access to better information than the National Rail Enquiries helpdesk, I am told that Central are still selling return tickets. Thanks. Bloody helpful you’ve been!

So I call the sales line after all. And it’s an automated voice recognition system. First off I’m invited to take part in a customer service survey. With hindsight I wish I’d said yes. I then go through all the palaver of calling out the trains, times and stations I want in a clear voice. And then I get “Please wait while I transfer you to our partner service” and I’m on the line to a young girl, who asks for all the details again as their system isn’t playing. After a brief mix up (because anybody could confuse LIVERPOOL with CHESTERFIELD) I am offered an advance saver for over £100.

“No thanks,” I say. “I want a Value 7.”
“Not available,” is the reply.
“Why?” I ask.
“Sold out,” says she.
“Already? For the end of January 2007?”
“Or not available…”
“And how do I find out?”
“I’ll check.”
Five minutes later.
“They’re not available yet. Try again in a week or two.”

Stunning!

So I’m still without travel yet and it’s getting closer.

Old pic time

Since you all got denied my Halloween pic I thought I'd upload anoher pic of me making more of an effort. Behold a pic from March when I went to Wendyhouse in Leeds for a night of gothing-it-up:

For those plus-size trannies wondering, the dress is Sessocaldo Black from Lady B Wear

Owwwwww!

Last Saturday I woke up wth a tremendous ache in my lower back. Its put me in a load of pain for the last week. Moving from a sharp pain when I moved, to a dull ache all the time with a jab if I catch it wrong. And it makes all my muscles around the area tense up leading to pressure on bits that really need to hang free if you get my drift.

It might be liked to my back pain in summer when I strained muscles and had a blackout, but the smart money is on a trapped sciatic nerve. Especially as the pain has moved to my hips, and my right leg feels like it has a cold metal wire just under the skin.

Either way, I'm off to the doc's tomorrow, so hopefully I'll get a diagnosis, and maybe something better than Deep Heat.

Fingers crossed

Singles Life

Back in the day there used to be three bus companies in this town. The Blue Buses were subsidised by the council and were fairly clean and fairly efficient. Eastern Counties were private run, served the outlying villages, but I always tought hey were a bit seedy, and then there was the mavericks of The Flying Banana. Shoddy, but incredibly cheap, and again they also served the sticks. And you could play bingo on them when they first started operating (yes really).

When Eastern Counties drove the Blue Buses out, and bought out the Flying Banana, they pretty much had the monoply so could dictate how local bussing was run, so when they recently announced they were stopping return tickets and only selling singles "for our customers convenience" no one batted an eyelid. It didnt even make the local press.

So I was incredibly shocked to find Central Trains doing the same, and then the girl at the train station said "everyone's doing it".

Do they really have that much contempt for the traveller, or is there really no competition to keep them in check. Or, conspiracy theory time, is it part of some grand Illuminati scheme to destroy public transport?

As a result I have to wait till Central sorts out their ticket structure before I can book my tickets to Transpocalypse.

Bugger!

Halloween Redux

I've removed the entry and pic of my Halloween outfit. Partly because I was unhappy with the pic, but also because it doesn't belong here.

This is Pandora's hideaway. Its a blog about her, not the guy that is sometimes her.

This Halloween I was in drag, but I was not presenting as female, and was not being Pandora.

The people I was with do not know about her, and to go full out would have given out the wrong signals.

By making a decent effort, but not going too far (ie using a joke-shop wig rather than my own hair) everyone got to have a good night but continue to live in their favorite Egyptian river.

If you know me well enough to have my email, feel free to request pics by mail, but I'm only going to post pictures of me presenting on this blog from now on.

Facial recognition

I'm a little baffled by some of the choices, but I'm quite pleased overall!

Performing Monkey?

I cancelled going to a party over the weekend.

Originally I was considering trannying, as there was some half-arsed attempt at fancy dress. But when I remembered the organiser couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery, I changed my mind. Having a date also changed it :)

Sadly my date cancelled (very good reason as it happens), and without her I didn't really feel like going out. You could also say it wasn't my first choice of location or crowd.

So when I texted the birthday boy, I got the following reply:

"That sucks man. I told everyone there was going to be a tranny at my party."

What am I? A performing fucking monkey? Am I free entertainment? At the very least I expect the going rate! If he brings it up when I next see him words will be had!

Danger Will Robinson!

I’ve recently been quite freaked out by the quality of voice recognition technology. OK so my Nintendo DS can recognise when I say four colours (blue, black, red and yellow) and the numbers zero to ten. I can accept this as they are phonetically diverse.

But yesterday I booked a hotel room for Transpocalypse via an automated system. It could recognise my name once said and spelt, it knew my address from the first line and postcode, but what freaked me out most was it recognising the city. They’ve hundreds of locations and it knew where I meant. It even read it back in that scary sub-American “you have been selected for a special offer” voice.

Scary, but better than the old days off,

“Cancel”
“You have selected delete.”
“No. I said cancel.”
“Deleting all work. Are you sure?”
“NO!”
“You have confirmed deletion”
“Nooooooooooooooooooooo!”

Transpocalypse Then

So the Transpocalypse is in Liverpool this year then? I didn't go to the last one, but this could be fun, and I've got some leave due.

I think I'll have to see if I can raise a posse (this means you Mr Eichmann!) of interested bloggers, and plan an expedition.

For more info see: http://www.beckysweb.co.uk/beckysblog/2006/09/its-back.asp

I'm Spartacus!

Score one for the bad guys. :(

The higher-ups at our organisation had to report to a Parliament Select Committee about problems with the way we work, and our IT. And what do you know, they lied and said everything was fine and the staff were to blame.

The good guys got some publically available data and presented it to their MPs who then raised the matter in the Houses. Boy did the liars look silly!

Except that the two who did the whistleblowing got punished, and the liars got away scot free!
Some staff in the office they came from staged a mass walk out today (hooray). But sadly we couldn't do it. Many of us have been on the receiving end of victimisation, and they're ust looking for an excuse.

If the union says "all out", then I'm but, but sadly I can't support a wildcat. Which is a shame, because I'm al for it in theory, its just a bit tricky in practice with the really crap job market right now.

I'm not Spartacus, honest!

I'm a f**king professional

I hate my customers.

Because of professionalism and our policies I have to say things like "No I'm sure you did", "I believe you sent the money in", "No I'm sure you're not just stalling."
What I want to say is "LIAR!", "I know you haven't sent the money", "stop stalling or I send in the bailiffs!"

They're not all like that, but you dont remember the good ones do you? That's because the good ones are quick, painless, and are over in a day or two, and the bastards hang around like a bad smell for months.

Breathe. Calm. Breathe. And relax...

Are you guys in a band?

Went to a multimedia performance art thing yesterday in Norwich. It was interesting.Some peices could only be described as self indulgant wank, or as I diplomatically said at the time "too challenging for my tastes". Others were clever, deep, or even funny - if you get a chance see two acoustic performers called Silent Monkey.

It was all organised by Mooncalf Curios, some sort of East coast artistic collective. It was interesting enough that I plan to go to their next event in November. I also want to hear the second part of the spoken word fairy tale.

Highlight of the day? Turning up and loking puzzed we were greeted by one of the organisers with, "Thanks for coming, are you guys playing today?" I've been mistaken for a number of things, but not a musician before.

But its wrong...

Worried about the legal aspects of my dressing up? Fret no longer!
Here's a scan of my licence:


(And if you want your own visit http://www.beckysweb.co.uk/)

Why would you do that?

I was having a coffee with fellow blogger Richard Eichmann today, and he asked why I did what I do, and how I identify myself as a T*person.

At the time I didn't really have an answer, and just mentioned places like The Angels Forum where we debate the pressing issues of T*Society, like what exactly the difference is between a transvestite, a cross dresser, and a gender-bender.

I've never really thought about it too hard, but I thought I would try to put down is words my own personal feelings on why I do what I do, but bear in mind that if you asked 10 trannies why they do it, you'll get 13 answers!

Some people cross-dress simply because they like the feel. I can understand this. Silk and lace have a nice feel to them, and women's cotton pants feel nicer than men’s cotton pants. There are also fetish costumes that mostly come in women’s styles such as satin maids outfits and PVC nurses uniforms.

So yes I dress because I like the feel. But that’s not the only reason. Although playing Twister in a miniskirt with a bunch of girls was a whole new ball game (no pun intended!)

Some people dress because they identify themselves more as female than male. Either they want to be a woman, or they believe a mistake was made by the doctor at birth (there are tales of hermaphrodite babies being made single gender in the delivery room), or maybe they just like girl stuff better.

Personally I identify myself as a healthy mix of genders. I wouldn't want a sex change in my current body, but I like discussing clothes and makeup, listening to Busted, and drinking Bacardi Breezers (official drink of the transgendered!) I also enjoy dancing far more as a girl - must be a self-consciousness thing! But I also like guns, action movies and Grand Theft Auto. So that's not the whole story either.

Some think women’s clothes are more interesting than men’s. Men's fashion is dull. Check any menswear department and you will find shirts and T-shirts, suits, sweaters, jeans, trainers, work shoes, and jackets. And that’s about it. Women have skirts, tops, dresses, Capri pants, culottes, hot pants, suits, lingerie, hundreds of different types of footwear, and more.

I think this one is a big part of it. Its not that only women’s clothes are more interesting, just that modern menswear is dull. I frequently dress in men’s fashions from the 1940 and the 1900s, because there is variety and style.

Some like to completely dress as women, for whatever reason. I think this is the biggest aspect of it for me. I like completely changing my appearance, though for me I try to present as realistically as possible. I don't want to dress completely as a woman; I want to look completely like a woman. I been clubbing a few times dressed up, and although I don't make a stunning woman, under night club conditions I've fooled bouncers, and made a bartender question my friends to prove I really was a guy (that felt amazing!)

Some people like to trick straight guys into dating them. This is one of the few I disagree with. Although I have flirted as a girl, it has only been with girls I fancied, and male friends who knew I was a bloke, and were just having a laugh. I'm not looking for a boyfriend, and if I was, I wouldn’t want to trap one on false pretences!

Some trannies just like to flaunt societies conventions - boys in dresses, boys in the ladies loos, boys having fun playing with dolls, or whatever.

I suppose this is also part of my rebellious nature. I really enjoy buying women’s clothes, partly because I want to wear them, but it’s also because it feels naughty and forbidden (even though it’s not really all that rebellious). I've also had the chance to see ladies loos, and in general they're much cleaner and nicer. Why are many guys in pubs/clubs messy pissers? Must be they can't handle their drink!

So what have we learned about me? I like playing at being someone else, and sometimes being a girl is more fun than being a guy. I also like to dress in an outlandish style, and women’s clothes are more available, and cheaper, than unusual menswear.

But am I a cross dresser, a transvestite, a drag queen (no, because that is a gay man dressing for showbiz), a gender bender, a gender-queer, a trannie, a tranny, a T*girl, an mtf (short for male-to-female), a transsexual (no, I'm not getting real breasts or losing my pecker!), or what?

I think overall I prefer T*girl (and sometimes T*Goth!), but as the community cannot decide on what all those terms mean, it’s still an open question.

What do you want?

(WARNING: This may sound like a whiny emo-kid ramble!)

A friend asked me and my social circle “What do you want to do before your next landmark birthday?” We went away and had a think about it. I think it’s the hardest question I’ve ever been asked.

I had one of those chats that go on till four in the morning with a close friend, and we discussed this. Hers were quite easy for her, including visiting a foreign country, joining the mile high club, and going to a music festival. Mine were much more difficult. Although I haven’t led an amazingly exciting life, most of her list I’ve already done (gone abroad), or wasn’t interested in (I’ve been inside an aeroplane toilet, so see no attraction to having sex there!)

Also, my interests have changed over the last few years. Asking me the same question five years ago would have brought out things like “Visit Japan”, something I’m not that fussed about now, as l only wanted to go for very shallow reasons that no longer apply. I’d have also included go out ‘dressed’ (done several times since), or held a snake (did a few weeks ago.).

There are a few things I want to do that really aren’t such a god idea in practice. For example I want a corset. But although this is great in theory, in practice I’ve got nowhere to wear it, I wouldn’t wear it enough to justify the expense, I don’t have the room, and I’ve no-one to lace it up. Several other require money I’m not willing to spend , or require a level of trust I’m not willing to make with the people I currently know (eg bondage play)

I think I have found maybe five.

1. Find a job I don’t hate (we all had this one first!)


2. Find someone I love, that loves me (vague I know)


3. Go to an Ann Summers Party (tricky with the no-guys rule, but we might be able to work something)


4. Have a food fight (location is tricky, but I’m sure I’m not the only one)


5. Regain my local fame (I used to be a big fish in a small pond, and getting that back would be enough)

But other than that, I don’t know.

There’s no where I want to go particularly and there are no specific sexual practices that I want to do enough to include (or share with my friends!).

I wish I wasn’t so aimless.

A Familiar Outing

*Jeff gets home from a night at Transmission to find his wife Sarah still up*
Sarah: Honey, we have to talk.
Jeff: Look its not...
Sarah: Honey.
*She gestures to the sofa. They both sit*
Sarah: You know we talked about shaving your legs...
Jeff: But it makes my legs look better, and the stockings don't snag...
Sarah: I know, we've talked about this. But is that the only reason you shave them?
Jeff: What do you mean?
Sarah: Well I was tidying up in the bedroom,
*Jeff begins to sweat*
Sarah: and I found a drop of oil on your trainers.
Jeff: So? That could have come from anywhere.
Sarah: And I found a pair of cycling shorts in the back of your wardrobe.
*Jeff breaks down in tears*
Jeff: Oh baby it's true! I'm a cyclist! I tried to fight it...
Sarah: Its OK...
Jeff: I just cant help it. I need to cycle. I tried purging, but you cant really fight it.
Sarah: We can get help. There are organisations. I've read aout this on the internet.
etc...

Bauer is God!

I've just been watching series four of 24. When will everyone learn that Bauer is always right? If they just asked Jack, everything would turn out fine.

Jack Bauer for president!

Or set him the problem of solving Lost, or the Middle East!

Bauer is God!

I've just been watching series four of 24. When will everyone learn that Bauer is always right? If they just asked Jack, everything would turn out fine.

Jack Bauer for president!

Or set him the problem of solving Lost, or the Middle East!

Anyone want a slave?

I've received two emails from potential slaves identically worded. I'm not interested, because I think its an email scam, but if ayone wants a slave try : esclavomuysumiso@hotmail.com.

The emails were apparently sent to anabeljohnstone@hotmail.com and Ann_onomiss@yahoo.com, although they came into my inbox. Bizarre!

The email reads (speling, punctuation and layout are as received):

Hello Ma'am
i am a slave , 30 years old. looking to serve a Mistress online, i
like bondage, humiliations, sotf to medium punishments, fetish,
spanking, worship, slavery, forced feeding, etc

i offer to be your online slave, receiving requests and task by
email , i will obwy the tasks and punishments sessions , i will take
pictures with a digital camera and send you the pics for your fun
and
amusement seeing me suffering and humilated for your own pleasure.

my toys list: shoe's laces, gag-ball, o-ring gag, nipples clams ,
weights for clamps, letaher gloves, full hood open eyes and mouth or
blind hood, spanking rulers, spoons etc

if you are interested in accept this worm as your online slave
please
reply my message Ma'am

respectfully , on my knees , kiss your boots

If that butters your muffin, have fun

All good things...

Well that was fast!

I'm single again! It was messy at frst but we're friends again. It wouldn't have worked out, but that doesn't stop me missing it.

We make better mischevious partners-in-crime than lovers anyway, so its all good.

Happy

Why am I happy?

There’s a young lady in my life who has just become a bit more than a friend.

Who is she?

I don’t want to jinx it, so no more details for now!

Cause and effect

At work we do a job that is subdivided into sections. Amazingly someone has only just realised that if you split the sections between different teams you can save on training. Both time and money.

Well technically it used to done that way. But some bright spark realised that if you train the staff to do the job start to finish, they can take ownership… blah blah blah. You know how organisations like to shake things about for no reason just to put something on the boss’s CV.

Anyhoo… Currently the first bit of the process (the easy bit) is being done by the newbies. Unfortunately they don’t seem to be up to the job. This means those of us doing the second section don’t have enough work, but still have to meet our trgets.

Common sense suggests taking a few of us and putting us on the newbies teams to either help out (most problems are not incredibly complex and can be solved by someone with a bit of familiarity with the system), or even to do some of the work ourselves to boost productivity.

I actually volunteered to help out without a bonus. (OK so there were the twin ulterior motives of getting away from our fascist overlord, and getting some easy work or a bit).

But no. The geniuses in charge decided to send the super-experienced veterans to help the newbies with their problems. And so to solve our problem of no work, they’ve given us the shitty work from another centre (which would be better cleared by those super-experienced veterans as we haven’t a clue what to do!)

Cue more people leaving and lower morale…

Sugar Rush

Just been watching Channel 4’s Sugar Rush, apparently its based on a book by Julie Birchill, but I’ve just been watching it.

It’s so sweet, well bittersweet really. The main character Kim is just so sweet. She’s a really sympathetic figure (except for causing the accidental death of a dog). Anyone who has loved someone they can’t have will empathise, not just lesbians.

Last nights episode, where Kim confessed all, was really touching. Unfortunately Channel 4 spoiled the end of the current series (admittedly repeats), by running a trailer for the new series coming this month.

I won’t spoil it for anyone watching along, but just the location of the trailer gave away what will ultimately happen between Kim and Sugar. Bah!

I’ll still keep watching, I’m just a bit put out that’s all.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

So it turns out that the girl I was really interested in, actually did like me, but was keeping a distance because she thought I was just a flirt, and a mutual friend had told her to back off!

Bloody interfering "friends"! Now she's 200 miles away, and seeing someone else.

Damn my "friend" and damn me for being so shy the girl didn't notice.

We kissed on our second meeting and I wished I'd pounced then. Dammit all to hell!

As she'll read this I'll just say "If it doesn't work out with your new boy, you know where I am. If I'm coming to visit you, I have no reponsibility to our mutual friend, and we can see how things go properly."

Isn't love complex?

With apologies to Dona Summer

Well I seem her every morning in the schoolyard
when the schoolbell rings
and when she passes in the hallway
well she doesn't seem to notice me
She's got a crush on my best friend
but he don't care, 'cause he loves someone else
I'm standing on the outside, not the inside where I wanna be

Love's unkind, love's unkind
love's unkind, love's unkind
'cause she's not mine

Just the other day I was praying that she'd give me a chance
hoping she would choose me for her partner
for the high school dance
I was standing outside the class
but it wasn't me, but my best friend, she asked
I went running back inside teary-eyed
and left the two of them behind

Love's unkind, love's unkind
love's unkind, love's unkind
'cause he's not mine

Spoken:
Oh, how I love her, but I can't even let her know
'cause she loves my best friend
but he don't care, he loves someone else
and I asked my mama, and she said: love's unkind
love's so unkind
She said: just keep it alive
'cause you may find love's unkind

Love's unkind, love's unkind
love's unkind, love's unkind

Spoken:
Oh, Why did I have to love her so
why did I have to love her so

Welcome to Hell

As if our office wasn't already as much like a circle of hell, we've had our air-con break. Naturally when we called them they suggested opening windows in the mean time.

Unfortunately some brain-donor architect decided to make a building where the windows cannot be opened so as not to break the air-con.

Fantastic! Now we are stuck in a greenhouse, and because the building is East/West facing we have permanent sunlight. And because some idiot set up the desks wrong we have to have the blinds shut or we can't see our screens.

Which means the light is insufficient to see with, so the lights come on.

So to summarise:
Permanent sunlight through huge glass windows.
Insulating blinds.
Fluorescent lights.
Hundreds of computers and printers.
And a broken air-con

Mix this with a computer system that doesn't work, and excessive bureaucracy, and you have Hell!

Night Terrors

I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. As I was standing there I went dizzy and collapsed. When I was "with it" again, I was on the floor with one arm in the toilet (eeew! but hardly my main concern).

When I'd calmed down a bit I called my mum's boyfriend (the only reliable driver I could think of) and they both ran me up to Accident and Emergency.

After what seems like hours, I got a blood pressure and blood sugar test a once over with the stethoscope, and the thing where they shine lights in your eyes, and get you to follow their finger with your eyes.

Turns out it was just that I wasn't getting enough blood to the brain - kind of an extreme form of when you stand up too quickly and feel dizzy - but with the bruises being on my ribs and near vital organs, and the panic of being alone and worried, it just made it worse.

I'm good now, but I'm going to get as much mileage as I can from showing off the bruises!

"Can everyone stop getting shot?"

Yesterday we went paint-balling. I'm glad I did it, but I don't have any plans to go again.
Don’t let anyone tell you it doesn't hurt - I have four fantastic bruises on my chest, and a great big welt on my left arm!

It was fun though. Tension, panic, hearing the balls ricochet off your cover, it’s all good.
My crowning moment was defending the red base from five blue guys after my mate's gun jammed. I took three down before I got clipped (by a coward firing blind round a corner!). Unfortunately, when the marshal confirmed I was eliminated, I stood up with my arm in the air to show I was out. I then got hit by four shots, prompting me to yell "I'M DEAD! STOP SHOOTING ME!"

We were supposed to be going out in the city afterwards, but to be honest I was shattered, so I went home to get a good nights sleep...

Two horse race

I've just come back from the polling station, and I'm disgusted that I had to spoil my ballot paper.

We only had two candidates, Conservative and Labour.

I dont want either. If it was a true democracy, not only would I be able to state my displeasure, but I'd also be able to nominate who I'd like to see on the council.

Remove the standing fee, and then lets see who'll win - Tony's Cronies, the Right Wing Fogeys, or Fred who drives the minibus for the local daycare centre?

I'll always vote for the underdog, even the Liberal Party. Lets give somebody else a chance to screw it up for a change.

EXCEPT the jizm monkeys at the BNP. They can go hang.

I can't feel my face!

I've just had two fillings (ouch!) and thanks to the anaesthetic I can't feel the left side of my face.
The numbness goes from my top lip to the corner of my eye, which also means when I blink I get a twinge.

I also cant have any hot food till the numbness wears off, and no hard food for 24 hours. I'm going to have to let my cereals go soggy tommorrow morning!

And I can't smile properly.

At least I can talk...

Hello nurse!

Fear me - I now have a baby-pink leatherette nurses dress and hat!
I'll need to shave my cleavage, as its a bit low cut, but it looks fantastic. And all for the bargain price of five English pounds. Hooray for end-of-line shops!

I'll have to get a pair latex gloves and practice some "Carry-On" type phrases...

Now which patient wanted the "hot beef injection"?

Future plans

Off to Leeds in a few weeks time. More Wendyhouse, but less crossdressing. Might be a bit of cosplay though. I should fit in with all the EGL/EGA crowd if I turn up as Tuxedo Mask.

[practices throwing roses]

Movie Mania

We love ASDA! Ater food shopping I looked at the DVD aisle, and came away with Final Fantasy VII:Advent Children, and Night Watch, both in double-disc editions for under £15 each. Yay!

edit: One of the characters in Advent Children has the FF7 "won battle" theme as a ringtone!

RPG deluge!

I was suposed to be going to a gig last Friday, but the guitarist broke his finger (ouch). Instead I wet to see my gaming buddies and came away with a car boot overladen with roleplaying books!
I've passed the Battletech stuff further down the food chain, but now I have Shadowru goodness, and my own copy of Call of Cthulhu! Woo!

[reads Cthulhu]
[loses marbles]

Forbidden Fruit, or something

Wow! Some friends have declared me "off limits" to a very sexy young lady in my acquaintance!
I'm forbidden fruit!

I hope she doesn't listen to them though.

[daydreams]
[sighs]

Boys will be girls

E4 have got a new show preniering, "Boys Will Be Girls" in which they get a bunch of washed up boyband members still desperate for fame, and persuade them to become a girlband. They'll then have to fool a studio audience.

But the big question I have is "Is this a semi-serious look at fame, gender, and desperation?" or (more likely) "Is this a Space-Cadets style prank meant to make guillable and desperate has-beens look foolish on TV?"

I'm hoping the former...

Press release reads as follows

In this brand new entertainment show, former 80's pop star Nathan Moore, who was once in bands World's Apart and Brother's Beyond, teams up with music industry guru and former head of A&R at Sony International Olivier Bezardi to try to pull off one of the most bizarre and funniest stunts in pop history: passing off a bunch of male ex pop-band members as a brand new girl band.

The road to pop fame is littered with casualties but how far will a fallen boy band star go to be famous again? Will the boys be desperate enough to act like girls, perform like girls and, of course, dress like girls in their quest to reclaim their former celebrity status?

In the first episode, Nathan and Olivier raid the industry scrapheap and invite suitable - and hopefully willing - boys to audition. As the lads give it their all, it becomes obvious how hungry they are for another bite at the pop cherry. But the boys have no idea about Olivier and Nathan's audacious plan. Finally they shortlist the four boys they want. But will the boys want to be in their band?

Near Death Experience

I was driving to work on Monday morning when I was overtaken by red van with two extending ladders on its roof.

As it passed the white van ahead of me, the wind swept the ladders off its roof. They then turned so they were across the road and bounced towards us throwing up dirt and gravel.

Fortunately the ladders hit the van in front and bounced into the overtaking lane. Even so I was lucky to avoid them, and the white van which stopped very suddenly.

I was tempted to stop and be a witness, but it seemed to be fairly cut-and-dried, especially as the red van stopped too. I hope they sorted it out.

Back on the Chain Gang

I visited friends in Leeds over the weekend. It was great. We did shopping, goth/alt clubbing, duelling practice (swords), and even snuck in some Live Action roleplaying (Vampire the Masquerade). I also got to meet cool, sexy, interesting people, and get startled by a 1:1 scale dinosaur model (some sort of 5ft tall 'raptor wannabe).

And then I had to go back to work. With a computer system so bad there are official 'work-arounds', customers who only tell us stuff when we threaten legal action, and a management team that cares only about performance figures, not what they mean, or how they are achieved.
I was planning to go back in a few months time. Maybe I'll consider going back a bit sooner.

Suck-fest

So I'm barely a month out of training and we've had a re-shuffle at work. I'm boted off to another team who are understaffed. And guess what? Apart from our two consolidators, I'm the most experienced person on the team.
You were lisening when I said "barely a month out of training" right?
At least I'm still in the same wing of the building.

Tranny's night out

Birthdays of alternative-lifestyle friends are always a good time to tranny. Managed to sneak another outing last night, but toned it down a bit. Cute t-shirt, denim mini and opaque tights. My friend was impressed by my patent stilettoes. "They are gorgeous," she said. And the reputation built with another friend who told me that every other time she'd seen me was in drag.

Girl's got a reputation to maintain, no?

Do you know what you're applying for?

There's a job advert in my local paper today. It sounds really good -
challenging, dealing with people in difficult circumstances, gathering
information from a variety of sources, a good benefits package, and £13K a
year (not too bad for a basic office job in Norwich). The only catch is that
it's two late nights per week, and one Saturday in four.
In fact it sounds better than my job - working for a hated department in the
civil service (I'll give you a clue, until last week we were always scouring
our roof for men in batman costumes).
Until you realise it IS my job. Our department is so hated that we can't even
mention our name at the job advert stage for fear of scaring people off. And
if you've applied as a Jobseeker, you won't find out who you are applying for
until its too late to back out without losing your JSA!
So if you were tempted by the ad, ask for more information before you apply.
Who knows, I may even be wrong - but I doubt it. Caveat operae - Employee
beware!

Google Bomb!

I'm backing the campaign to get Transformation off the top spot for Google searches with the Anti-Transformation Google Bomb!

The idea is to "Google Bomb" the Wikipedia entry for transvestite with links labeled simply with the word "transvestite". Google should hopefully see all the links for that word pointing to Wikipedia and count it as a more authoritative source of information.

If you have a blog or a web site, and you support the campaign, please copy and paste the code in the box below into your blog. You'll be doing trannies of the UK and around the world a favour!

Click on the word to find out more about being a transvestite.

If you'd like to use this entire message in your own blog to help promote the Google-Bomb, you can download it at Becky's Web here.